Chunks English
    Dating

    Dating English: 40 Chunks for Every Stage

    Dating in a second language is a timing problem: by the time you've built the sentence, the moment has passed. These 40 chunks follow the arc of a date, ready to use whole.

    40 chunks
    Two Chunkys chatting over coffee at a small round table

    Dating in a second language is a latency problem. You know what you want to say, but by the time the sentence is assembled the conversation has moved on three turns — and on a date what matters is usually not what you said, but whether you had it ready.

    The 40 chunks below follow the arc of a date: introducing yourself and opening, finding a topic, asking for the next one, saying how you feel, and closing gracefully. Each has its meaning and three examples, deliberately spanning different levels of closeness — the same line carries different weight on a first date and a third.

    1. 01

      Hi, my name is ...

      Use this basic phrase to introduce yourself when meeting someone new.

      Examples

      • Hi, my name is Tom. Nice to meet you.

        Hi, my name is Tom. Nice to meet you.

      • Hi, my name is Sarah. What's yours?

        Hi, my name is Sarah. What's yours?

      • Hi, my name is Ben. Are you new here?

        Hi, my name is Ben. Are you new here?

    2. 02

      What do you like to do for fun...?

      Ask about hobbies or interests to start a casual conversation.

      Examples

      • What do you like to do for fun on weekends?

        What do you like to do for fun on weekends?

      • What do you like to do for fun after work?

        What do you like to do for fun after work?

      • What do you like to do for fun in this city?

        What do you like to do for fun in this city?

    3. 03

      Are you free...?

      Ask if someone is available for an activity or a date.

      Examples

      • Are you free this Friday night?

        Are you free this Friday night?

      • Are you free for coffee tomorrow?

        Are you free for coffee tomorrow?

      • Are you free to grab lunch with me?

        Are you free to grab lunch with me?

    4. 04

      I had a great time...

      Express enjoyment and satisfaction after an activity or a date.

      Examples

      • I had a great time with you tonight.

        I had a great time with you tonight.

      • I had a great time at the party.

        I had a great time at the party.

      • I had a great time talking to you.

        I had a great time talking to you.

    5. 05

      Can I get your...?

      Politely ask for someone's contact information to stay in touch.

      Examples

      • Can I get your phone number?

        Can I get your phone number?

      • Can I get your Instagram?

        Can I get your Instagram?

      • Can I get your email address?

        Can I get your email address?

    6. 06

      Do you come here often...?

      A common icebreaker asking if someone frequently visits a place.

      Examples

      • Do you come here often for coffee?

        Do you come here often for coffee?

      • Do you come here often on weekends?

        Do you come here often on weekends?

      • Do you come here often to read?

        Do you come here often to read?

    7. 07

      I'd love to hear more about...

      Expressing a desire to learn more about someone's interests or experiences.

      Examples

      • I'd love to hear more about your travels.

        I'd love to hear more about your travels.

      • I'd love to hear more about your job.

        I'd love to hear more about your job.

      • I'd love to hear more about your hobbies.

        I'd love to hear more about your hobbies.

    8. 08

      Where are you from...?

      Asking about someone's hometown or country of origin.

      Examples

      • Where are you from originally?

        Where are you from originally?

      • Where are you from in the city?

        Where are you from in the city?

      • Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking?

        Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking?

    9. 09

      You seem really...

      Giving a simple compliment about someone's personality or demeanor.

      Examples

      • You seem really friendly.

        You seem really friendly.

      • You seem really interesting.

        You seem really interesting.

      • You seem really confident.

        You seem really confident.

    10. 10

      Do you want to grab a...?

      A casual invitation for an immediate, low-commitment activity.

      Examples

      • Do you want to grab a coffee sometime?

        Do you want to grab a coffee sometime?

      • Do you want to grab a quick drink?

        Do you want to grab a quick drink?

      • Do you want to grab a bite to eat?

        Do you want to grab a bite to eat?

    11. 11

      What kind of ... do you usually enjoy?

      Ask about someone's preferred types of things, like music or movies, to understand their taste.

      Examples

      • What kind of music do you usually enjoy?

        What kind of music do you usually enjoy?

      • What kind of movies do you usually enjoy watching?

        What kind of movies do you usually enjoy watching?

      • What kind of books do you usually enjoy reading?

        What kind of books do you usually enjoy reading?

    12. 12

      What do you think of...?

      Ask for someone's opinion or thoughts on a specific thing to start a conversation.

      Examples

      • What do you think of this place?

        What do you think of this place?

      • What do you think of the new cafe downtown?

        What do you think of the new cafe downtown?

      • What do you think of the band playing tonight?

        What do you think of the band playing tonight?

    13. 13

      Do you have any exciting plans for...?

      Ask if someone has special plans for the future, showing interest in their life.

      Examples

      • Do you have any exciting plans for the weekend?

        Do you have any exciting plans for the weekend?

      • Do you have any exciting plans for your vacation?

        Do you have any exciting plans for your vacation?

      • Do you have any exciting plans for tonight?

        Do you have any exciting plans for tonight?

    14. 14

      What brings you to...?

      Ask why someone is at a particular place or event, initiating a conversation.

      Examples

      • What brings you to this party tonight?

        What brings you to this party tonight?

      • What brings you to this event?

        What brings you to this event?

      • What brings you to the city this week?

        What brings you to the city this week?

    15. 15

      Have you ever tried...?

      Ask if someone has experienced something specific, finding common ground or recommending it.

      Examples

      • Have you ever tried this coffee before?

        Have you ever tried this coffee before?

      • Have you ever tried the food here?

        Have you ever tried the food here?

      • Have you ever tried kayaking?

        Have you ever tried kayaking?

    16. 16

      Are you more of a saver or a spender...?

      Asking if someone prefers saving money or spending it.

      Examples

      • Are you more of a saver or a spender when it comes to travel?

        Are you more of a saver or a spender when it comes to travel?

      • I'm curious, are you more of a saver or a spender in general?

        I'm curious, are you more of a saver or a spender in general?

      • When you go shopping, are you more of a saver or a spender?

        When you go shopping, are you more of a saver or a spender?

    17. 17

      I try to be mindful of the cost when...

      Expressing awareness of expenses in a situation.

      Examples

      • I try to be mindful of the cost when choosing a restaurant for dinner.

        I try to be mindful of the cost when choosing a restaurant for dinner.

      • When planning a trip, I try to be mindful of the cost.

        When planning a trip, I try to be mindful of the cost.

      • I try to be mindful of the cost when buying gifts for friends.

        I try to be mindful of the cost when buying gifts for friends.

    18. 18

      Are you saving up for anything fun...?

      Asking if someone is saving money for an enjoyable plan.

      Examples

      • Are you saving up for anything fun, like a big trip or a new gadget?

        Are you saving up for anything fun, like a big trip or a new gadget?

      • I'm saving up for a new camera. Are you saving up for anything fun?

        I'm saving up for a new camera. Are you saving up for anything fun?

      • Are you saving up for anything fun, like a concert or a special event?

        Are you saving up for anything fun, like a concert or a special event?

    19. 19

      How do you usually like to handle the bill...?

      Asking about someone's preferred way to pay the bill.

      Examples

      • After dinner, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

        After dinner, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

      • For coffee, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

        For coffee, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

      • When you go out with friends, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

        When you go out with friends, how do you usually like to handle the bill?

    20. 20

      I often look for activities that are more...

      Expressing a preference for certain types of activities.

      Examples

      • I often look for activities that are more affordable, like picnics in the park.

        I often look for activities that are more affordable, like picnics in the park.

      • When going out, I often look for activities that are more relaxed and less expensive.

        When going out, I often look for activities that are more relaxed and less expensive.

      • I often look for activities that are more budget-friendly but still fun.

        I often look for activities that are more budget-friendly but still fun.

    21. 21

      When it comes to money, what do you value most, like...?

      Asking what someone values most about money, like security or freedom.

      Examples

      • When it comes to money, what do you value most, like saving for a house or travel?

        When it comes to money, what do you value most, like saving for a house or travel?

      • For me, financial security is very important. What about you?

        For me, financial security is very important. What about you?

      • When it comes to money, I value freedom to do what I want.

        When it comes to money, I value freedom to do what I want.

    22. 22

      Do you tend to spend more on experiences or material things, for example...?

      Asking if someone prefers spending on experiences or physical possessions.

      Examples

      • Do you tend to spend more on experiences or material things, for example, concerts or new clothes?

        Do you tend to spend more on experiences or material things, for example, concerts or new clothes?

      • I definitely prefer spending on experiences like travel or trying new restaurants.

        I definitely prefer spending on experiences like travel or trying new restaurants.

      • I usually buy things that last a long time, like good quality furniture.

        I usually buy things that last a long time, like good quality furniture.

    23. 23

      Do you usually plan your finances for the long term, like...?

      Asking if someone usually plans their finances for the long term.

      Examples

      • Do you usually plan your finances for the long term, like for retirement or big investments?

        Do you usually plan your finances for the long term, like for retirement or big investments?

      • I try to plan ahead, but sometimes it's hard to stick to a budget.

        I try to plan ahead, but sometimes it's hard to stick to a budget.

      • Yes, I have a savings goal for next year, so I'm planning carefully.

        Yes, I have a savings goal for next year, so I'm planning carefully.

    24. 24

      What kind of budget do you usually prefer for fun activities, such as...?

      Asking about someone's preferred budget for leisure activities.

      Examples

      • What kind of budget do you usually prefer for fun activities, such as a concert or a dinner out?

        What kind of budget do you usually prefer for fun activities, such as a concert or a dinner out?

      • I'm open to different budgets, but I like to know roughly what to expect.

        I'm open to different budgets, but I like to know roughly what to expect.

      • I usually prefer more affordable options for casual outings.

        I usually prefer more affordable options for casual outings.

    25. 25

      Is it important for you to be financially independent, or...?

      Asking if financial independence is important to them.

      Examples

      • Is it important for you to be financially independent, or do you prefer to share expenses?

        Is it important for you to be financially independent, or do you prefer to share expenses?

      • Financial independence is very important to me; it gives me peace of mind.

        Financial independence is very important to me; it gives me peace of mind.

      • I believe in being independent, but I also like the idea of supporting each other.

        I believe in being independent, but I also like the idea of supporting each other.

    26. 26

      I really value ... in a relationship.

      Express what qualities or values you prioritize in a relationship.

      Examples

      • I really value honesty in a relationship.

        I really value honesty in a relationship.

      • For me, I really value open communication in a relationship.

        For me, I really value open communication in a relationship.

      • I really value mutual respect in a relationship.

        I really value mutual respect in a relationship.

    27. 27

      I'm looking for someone who is...

      Describe the qualities you hope to find in a partner.

      Examples

      • I'm looking for someone who is kind and understanding.

        I'm looking for someone who is kind and understanding.

      • I'm looking for someone who is adventurous and loves to travel.

        I'm looking for someone who is adventurous and loves to travel.

      • I'm looking for someone who is supportive of my goals.

        I'm looking for someone who is supportive of my goals.

    28. 28

      For me, shared ... are very important.

      Emphasize the importance of having certain things in common.

      Examples

      • For me, shared interests are very important.

        For me, shared interests are very important.

      • For me, shared values are very important in a relationship.

        For me, shared values are very important in a relationship.

      • For me, shared future goals are very important.

        For me, shared future goals are very important.

    29. 29

      What do you look for in a ...?

      Ask what the other person seeks in a partner or relationship.

      Examples

      • What do you look for in a partner?

        What do you look for in a partner?

      • What do you look for in a long-term relationship?

        What do you look for in a long-term relationship?

      • What do you look for in a connection with someone?

        What do you look for in a connection with someone?

    30. 30

      I believe that ... is essential.

      Express what you believe is indispensable in a relationship.

      Examples

      • I believe that trust is essential for any relationship to grow.

        I believe that trust is essential for any relationship to grow.

      • I believe that mutual understanding is essential.

        I believe that mutual understanding is essential.

      • I believe that honesty is essential in love.

        I believe that honesty is essential in love.

    31. 31

      I believe family is very important for...

      Direct English translation (I think family is very important for...)

      Examples

      • I believe family is very important for happiness and personal growth.

        I think family is very important for happiness and individual development.

      • I believe family is very important for teaching us values and traditions.

        I think family is very important for teaching us values and customs.

      • I believe family is very important for providing a sense of belonging.

        I think family is very important for giving us a feeling of belonging.

    32. 32

      I'm curious about your thoughts on having children and...

      Direct English translation (I'm interested in your opinion about having children and...)

      Examples

      • I'm curious about your thoughts on having children and raising them in a big city.

        I'm interested in your opinion about having children and raising them in a large city.

      • I'm curious about your thoughts on having children and balancing work with family life.

        I'm interested in your opinion about having children and finding a balance between work and family life.

      • I'm curious about your thoughts on having children and the best age to start a family.

        I'm interested in your opinion about having children and the ideal age to start a family.

    33. 33

      Growing up, my family taught me a lot about...

      Direct English translation (When I was young, my family taught me a lot about...)

      Examples

      • Growing up, my family taught me a lot about kindness and helping others.

        When I was young, my family taught me a lot about being kind and helping other people.

      • Growing up, my family taught me a lot about hard work and perseverance.

        When I was young, my family taught me a lot about working hard and never giving up.

      • Growing up, my family taught me a lot about the importance of honesty.

        When I was young, my family taught me a lot about how important it is to be honest.

    34. 34

      I really value spending time with my family, especially when we...

      Direct English translation (I really appreciate spending time with my family, especially when we...)

      Examples

      • I really value spending time with my family, especially when we cook together.

        I really appreciate spending time with my family, especially when we cook meals together.

      • I really value spending time with my family, especially when we visit new places.

        I really appreciate spending time with my family, especially when we travel to new locations.

      • I really value spending time with my family, especially when we celebrate holidays.

        I really appreciate spending time with my family, especially when we celebrate special days.

    35. 35

      For me, family means having a strong support system and...

      Direct English translation (For me, family means having a strong support network and...)

      Examples

      • For me, family means having a strong support system and always having someone to talk to.

        For me, family means having a strong support network and always having someone I can talk to.

      • For me, family means having a strong support system and a place where I feel safe.

        For me, family means having a strong support network and a place where I feel secure.

      • For me, family means having a strong support system and sharing all the big moments in life.

        For me, family means having a strong support network and sharing all the important times in life.

    36. 36

      What's something you feel really passionate about...?

      What is something you feel very strongly about?

      Examples

      • What's something you feel really passionate about, like a hobby or a cause?

        What is something you feel very strongly about, like a hobby or a cause?

      • I feel really passionate about helping animals; it's very important to me.

        I feel very strongly about helping animals; it's very important to me.

      • Do you have something you feel really passionate about that you love to talk about?

        Do you have something you feel very strongly about that you love to talk about?

    37. 37

      What do you value most in a friendship/relationship...?

      What is most important to you in a friendship/relationship?

      Examples

      • What do you value most in a friendship, like trust or honesty?

        What is most important to you in a friendship, like trust or honesty?

      • For me, I value honesty and good communication most in a relationship.

        For me, I value honesty and good communication most in a relationship.

      • Do you value loyalty most in a friendship, or something else?

        Do you value loyalty most in a friendship, or something else?

    38. 38

      What's one thing you always make time for, even when you're busy...?

      What is one thing you always find time for, even when busy?

      Examples

      • What's one thing you always make time for, even when you're busy, like reading?

        What is one thing you always find time for, even when you're busy, like reading?

      • Even when I'm super busy, I always make time for my morning coffee and a walk.

        Even when I'm super busy, I always find time for my morning coffee and a walk.

      • Is there one special thing you always make time for, no matter what?

        Is there one special thing you always find time for, no matter what?

    39. 39

      What kind of things do you find truly inspiring...?

      What kind of things truly motivate or move you?

      Examples

      • What kind of things do you find truly inspiring, like nature or great stories?

        What kind of things truly motivate or move you, like nature or great stories?

      • I find people who overcome challenges truly inspiring.

        I find people who overcome challenges truly motivating.

      • Do you find art or music truly inspiring?

        Do you find art or music truly motivating?

    40. 40

      Are you someone who enjoys learning new things...?

      Are you a person who likes to learn new things?

      Examples

      • Are you someone who enjoys learning new things, like a new language or skill?

        Are you a person who likes to learn new things, like a new language or skill?

      • Yes, I'm definitely someone who enjoys learning new things all the time.

        Yes, I'm definitely a person who likes to learn new things all the time.

      • Some people enjoy learning new things, others prefer familiar routines. Which are you?

        Some people like to learn new things, others prefer familiar routines. Which are you?

    How to work through this page

    1. 1Start with the follow-up lines. Openers are the easy part to prepare. The hard part is what you say after they answer.
    2. 2Watch the intensity ladder. I had a great time and I really like you are several rungs apart, and getting the order wrong is far more awkward than getting the grammar wrong.
    3. 3Drill until it's automatic. These chunks only work once they're reflexive — a line you have to retrieve is a line you don't have.

    Why automaticity comes from whole-phrase storage is explained in What are chunks? A complete guide. To make the compliments land better, see Complimenting in English.

    Frequently asked questions

    How do I say I like someone without it landing too heavily?

    I like you in English is more direct than learners usually expect — it reads close to a declaration. For something lighter, use I've really enjoyed spending time with you or I'd love to see you again. The rough ladder is: I had a great time → I'd love to see you again → I really like you → I'm falling for you.

    How do I ask for a second date without seeming pushy?

    Being specific is less awkward, not more. Are you free next weekend? works far better than We should hang out sometime — the second is close to a politeness formula, and native speakers mostly don't read it as a real invitation. Anything with sometime tends not to be taken seriously.

    How do I turn someone down politely?

    The English pattern is thank, then be clear: I've had a really nice time, but I don't think we're a match. Direct without being unkind. Avoid leaving it at Maybe another time — in English that reads as leaving the door open, which strings the other person along.

    What's safe to talk about on a first date?

    English-speaking first dates favour topics that are light but specific: what you're watching, what your weekends look like, travel, food. Steer clear of salary, exes and politics. What do you like to do for fun? is a classic opener precisely because it lets the other person choose how deep to go.

    Practise until you don't have to think

    ChunksEnglish uses shadowing and recording playback to move chunks from understood to sayable. Core features are free.

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